The Journey

Twenty five years ago Suzanne and I had just graduated from seminary in Fort Worth, Texas, we were looking for a place to invest our lives and we wanted a chance to prove the gospel... to ourselves.  It is not to say that we did not believe what we were taught or what we were teaching.  But we were looking for more than here-say   We wanted a deep personal conviction backed by our own experience that would carry us through the trials of life.

So when we graduated we prayed, "God we are ready but please get us out of the Bible Belt."  It wasn't that we had anything against Texas but we were looking for a place where our faith in God was not such a prominent part of the culture.  Within a few months we were in Idaho and our journey with God began in earnest.

Twenty five years later we have our own history with the Lord, a history that continues to grow and become richer and fuller. It is full of normal everyday stories of His faithfulness and of miraculous interventions of healings and provisions.  We are grateful for our journey with the Lord and know something we didn't back then.  God is real, he is engaged with us and is walking this journey out with us every step of the way.  We are not alone.  He is there to catch us and sustain us and teach us about Himself.

But our journey is far from over.  He is continually teaching us.  A few years ago we stopped pastoring full time and moved to Boise.  We thought we were just going to step into the next phase of ministry.  But we were wrong.  I read something a few years back that I never forgot.  Stephen Covey wrote, "If you want to make a new contribution, you must make a whole new preparation."

Suzanne and I did not realize that our new contribution would come as we went through a whole new preparation but that is what we have experienced.  We felt parts of our life "taken away" and our fruitful branches severely pruned.  He was leading us into an understanding that our identity is found not in what we do or a title we hold but in who we are in our core being.  We have had to learn to receive our praise from God and Him alone.  We entered a season of "hiddeness" so that God could do a deeper work in our hearts.    Through this time we have come to discover the love of God in way we have never known it before.  How profound is His love!!!!  We have also learned more about who we are.  If you want to be known by God you have to be honest with your self and with Him.  In times of desperation there is no hiding.  It all gets laid out there and we are so much better for it.

Why does God allow these times to happen?  I just think maybe he is trying to "thicken the sauce."  At the end of the day He is looking for something a little more substantive.  All victory and no challenges makes a person shallow.  Premature success breeds superficiality.  And so we have had our wings clipped and our feathers plucked it would seem.  But in the process miracles happen deep in our hearts.  And that is what we have discovered.  The kingdom is always advancing.  Sometimes it is advancing outwardly and that is always nice.  But the real work of the New Covenant is when God does a work inwardly.  When the miracles begin to manifest in the demeanor of one's face and in the thoughts and motivations of one's heart, a person starts looking at the adventure of life differently.  Our hearts get reconciled to the ways of God.  We stop resisting and begin cooperating with the process.

I used to complain about the hardships, but I don't as much anymore.  I am discovering that I am less and less offended with God when things don't seem to go my way.  I am realizing that God is after something deeper and I am starting to be ok with it.  "Deep is calling to deep," David writes, and at first I think it was the deep in God calling to the deep in me.  At first I could not hear the call.  My deep inner man was asleep.  But lately I am wondering if something hasn't awakened and for the first time the deep in me is calling to the deep in Him.  

Thirty years ago, when Suzanne and I got married I wrote out my invitation.

I will bless the Lord at all times

His praise shall continually be in my mouth.

My soul shall make its boast in the Lord

the humble shall see it and rejoice.

Oh magnify the Lord with me,

Let us exalt his name together.  

Psalm 34:1-3

Suzanne was gracious enough to say yes.  I am forever grateful for a such a companion to walk out this journey.  Humanly speaking, I could not have made it without her.  On our wedding day my "best man" Mike Arakawa looked at me and said, "She is perfect for you."  I never forgot that for indeed she was and God knew it.  

Thirty years ago, we worshiped the Lord by faith.  But now we do it by the personal revelation of God's heart to ours.  We worship Him because of thousands of instances of His faithfulness, through unexpected and random acts of kindness, because of friends who love us in spite of our immaturity and brokenness, because of miracles external and internal.  God has met us so many ways again and again.  Faith is not something we have to work up but rather a substance that has been worked within us that we draw upon.  We have had times together that were so powerful and rich and filled with joy that we literally felt heaven on earth.  Other times have been more difficult.  But the presence of the Lord has been the one constant thing we have enjoyed together.  It is the foundation of our love and our marriage and our friendship and fellowship and our celebration and our joy.  And it is the reason we are still in the journey and more blessed and excited than ever.  

This is our story and though I don't suspect that anyone is going to make a movie about it, we would not trade it for anyone else's because it is ours alone.  This is how God has chosen to reveal himself to us.  No one can fulfill their destiny wishing to be somebody else.  God is changing us and establishing us with Him and with you.  This is our testimony to His faithfulness.  This is our greatest treasure.

As we begin to posture ourselves for the next leg of the journey, we would like to offer you an invitation that entered into 30 years ago.

We will bless the Lord at all times

His praise shall continually be in our mouths

Our souls shall make their boast in the Lord,

the humble shall hear it and rejoice.

Oh magnify the Lord with us,

And let us exalt His name together.  

God bless you all.

Brian and Suzanne Harrison